I am no singular thing, I am a human with a beating heart and a soul that believes in magic. Not the spell kind but the smile of a child and true love. I get distracted by shining objects like glitter but i am serious most of the time. I’m hardly ever at ease, something always brings the negativity. I believe that punctuality is a virtue and a ring will mean forever. I’m naive and young at heart with a heart that’s never been touched. I doubt myself in many ways, innumerable to list. I belong to a world of books and music, forever a book worm and fan girl. In those worlds I am safe. I live with constant pain and a perfection I seek. I hate stepping out of my comfort zone, I’d prefer to hide than shine at times. I like empty trains and cinemas – crowds make me afraid, too claustrophobic to think.
at times I don’t believe in myself, i beat myself up for the smallest mistakes. But I have no regrets. I seek human connection and understanding. I’m constantly confused and slow in life choices. I find it hard to sleep and remember my dreams. I live my life simply knowing what I want is out of reach and somehow I mumble through. I want to know the world but i prevent myself, I’m terrified of flying, being unable to communicate, failure to achieve my dreams and falling in love. Perhaps I let it rule my life and only see the bad things but it seems the good is so hard to find. I can only challenge myself so far before i crumble but unfortunately I’m not a quitter, i am persistent and loyal.